Monday, August 28, 2006

Bike no power lah. How?

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Aiyah!! I tell you, the past 1 year or so I spent quite a lot on my bike man. I’ve overhauled the baby, repaint it, changed its parts and god knows what.

After the project’s done I was darn happy.

But then when it comes to corners… I can’t take corners as before.

Hmmm…. There’s some problem with the braking as well. I can’t seemed to stop fast enough. It seems that more often than not I have to really lock the rear tyre for it to stop properly.

And then… what irks me the most is the fact that it has lost a lot of its top speed. I can only do only 110-115kmh max before the air resistance becomes too much and unbearable, while previously it can hit 140-150 with no problem.

Aiyoh! Others nevermind. But top speed I kennot.

Basket spend many thousands and top speed kennot even go more than 115? Chet! Stupid bike! Been together for 7 years already, got you a new paint, do a bypass on your heart and this is how you repay me? GRRRRRRR!

Ok la… Ok la. Can’t blame the bike lah. Maybe I got soo fat that I have the aerodynamic of a lard! Before blame people look in the mirror first lah right??

So I got meself a leather jacket.

Then Vrooom vroommm… test power and 117-118 only!! Basket!!!!

Then try the ultimate position, bent really low and *cue superman anthem…….


120!! 120!!!!!!!

Aiyoh!!! Like this confirm! Not aerodynamic problem. Must be power to weight ratio. I’m so fugging heavy that my 500 cc bike can only go 120!


If naik kapchai only 50kmh liao!!


Kena diet liao!!


Huh!? Diet?


Darn kaw saddd..!!! I love my fats!!! It make me look cute!


Then last Monday morning I got this sms

“Lajunya bawak motor!”

To which I replied “Where got? 90 only”

Then next morning I got another one

“You ride your bike more than 110km/h tau!”

Aiyah!! Having a bad week liao.. no need to pick up fight lah!!

So I quickly quickly call her to find out what’s wrong with her since she’s obviously picking a fight. Then she said “nothing wrong lah! U always scold me drive the car darn fast then you ride your bike darn fast cannnn???” aiyoh!! Fight liaooo… tsk tsk..

Then hor… I found out that she was telling the truth liao and she was doing 110kmh when I overtook her that morning and the day before was 100km/h. To make things a bit more interesting was that after I overtook her, few seconds later I was gone. ERK!




My bike’s speedo under reads liao! And the best part is it under reads by at least 30km/h.



YAHOOOOOOOO!!!!! no need diet!!!!!!!

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Fortune Teller and I : The HDD that got away

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photo : No fuel and I got a long long way to go

There I was last wednesday morning, sitting by the roadside while waiting for the PC shop to open. I was reasonably miffed as my I got the Big BAD BLUE screen of Terror from my notebook earlier in the day while I was busy rushing for 3. Coupled with the fact that I didn’t have a proper sleep the past week due to Lil’ D’s volatile temperature from some infection and rushing work at the same time, this rather interesting event couldn’t have happened on a better day. And they say Wednesday supposed to be your most productive day aye?

While I was minding my own business, reading through various brochures suddenly I heard somebody said “excuse me”.

I lift up my head and saw this elderly Singh and promptly smiled at him and said “Good morning & you’re excused” and immediately read the brochure and try to make sense of all this mumbo jumbo technical stuff.

Then, there it is again “Excuse me!”. Again, I lift my head and smile at him which then he immediately continue “Verry lucky face.” Emphasising on the letter R in those accent that’s very familiar with those from those Indian region decent. This white turban man in his 40s, small frame, around 5 feet 4 smiles at me and continues “This sundayy, 2 happiness will come your way. Yes, two happiness.”.

He smiled with a twinkle in his eyes as his head moves from side to side in sync with the rhythm of his speech, while his hands comes alive with gestures ending with him showing 2 of his fingers to me.

Hmmm… Inneresting. He then proceeds “This Sunday you will buy numbers and Happiness will come your way.”

I was a bit confused “What numbers?”

“OH! Numbers. I will give you 4 numbers and this Sunday you will buy those numbers.” He then proceeds to explain that he is a fortune teller and he can see the luck on my face and there’s this rhythm to his speech and how his heads moves and his body movement…

Then I abruptly tell him that I don't buy numbers.

And he looked at me and say “Never?”


“Long time ago?”


He tilted his head and scrutinizes my face and say “Are you muslim?”


“Alhamdulillah! I will pray for your happiness, your blabla blab la bla”

I smile

“Sedekah? Give me some Sedekah”

To which I replied, “I ain’t got no money dawg!”


Not quite with the gangsta lingo lah. But more or less like that .lah Ekekeke

Anyway, after this fortune teller episode, I found out my Hard Disk Drive konked and the Data in irretrievable, on the way to work on Friday my Bike ran out of fuel, stuck in the highway for a cool hour, breached my deadline, my back gave way, I can’t sit straight, I walk funny, Liverpool draw the first game, my Princess (that’s my daughter by the way) now suddenly got a fever, and Lil’ D still got the on and off high temperature. And Yes, I ain't got no sleep dawg.

Come Sunday… Nothing.

N O T H I N G !

Where la my 2 happiness dey?

Hmmmmmmmmmm….. well Iddy told me my 2 happiness are my 2 kids, yeap! You’re right. But lo and behold 1 was delivered 2 yrs ago while another was delivered 2 plus months ago.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I told you lot not to believe any of this fortune teller shit! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Side note : I still have a bad back and if you need your HDD’s data to be recovered pronto don’t go to the one on 4th floor at Low Yat. It’ll cost you a bomb and if it involve some hardware failure it’ll most probably took ‘em 1 month as they need to shipp the darn thing to Korea. DUH!

There is this company in Kepong in front of Jusco Called MDR Data Recovery that can do it in 3 days and cost a lot less and they didn’t have to ship the HDD to Timbuktu since they got a clean room themselves and they actually know what to do themselves. Cool!

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