Genius? ya right...

Ever met a real smart, genius fella but they just can’t get or do something that really basic? I mean real basic like left or right? Or 1 + 1 = 2? Or I’m a guy and she’s a woman? Things like tat? Don’t you find it odd?

I relate this particular odd/weird thing to a friend yesterday afternoon about a genius friend of mine who can’t tell which is left and which is right. That’s right? She can’t tell which of her hand is left and which is right. She has to put her hands up and make an L sign using her index and thumb. If it formed the letter L then she knew its Left. Ingenious innit? And she does that each and every time she needs to know which is Left and which is Right. Then the friend went “You mean her? But she’s a genius! How is it possible?”

Well, it is like this, I long suspected that its part of her way (and other genius like her) to make shmucks like me feels comfortable and not overawed by her geniusness (if there is such a word) and making her entirely human ie approachable. Seriously!

Yeah! Yeah! I love her dearly and she’s like a sister to me but it won’t blind me and stop me from seeing through the ruse. Come on…. It doesn’t make sense. It is so basic it is beyond comprehension. Somebody who watch footie as much as I do (if not more), listen to rock songs as much as I do(rock song suppose to be aint good), talk crap and make stupid jokes as much as I do and study the most around 5 minutes more than I do (and I don’t study ok?) can’t actually score wayyy way better than I can’t it? Well, you’re dead wrong! I like scored 1 A and 2 Bs and 1 C while this girl went to score straight A+ (not any As ok! A plus) and consistently got into the Dean’s list. And She can’t tell Left from Right? Oh!! Puhleaseee….

And this is the same girl who went like did her Masters like a breeze (actually in her own words “me just bumming around doing nuthin and get to watch footie’”) and like now finishing her doctorate well before turning 30. And she can’t tell Left from Right? Yeah right.

Then there’s another friend who just can’t seemed to grasp the offside trap ruling. I mean seriously, OFFSIDE! In footie!!! And He’s a guy!!!!! Yeah he don’t play footie or any sports for that matter (no! golf is not a sport!) but coming from a guy who got his engineering doctorate in his early 30s it’s a bit too far fetched innit?

There is a friend in school, who just can’t seem to do math properly. Everytime there’s an Add Math question this bugger would go to count using his fingers. Seriously! Its just like those small kids learning to count and realized they have 10 of those small twiddly fingers. He will go like 1, 2, 3 on his fingers and went to score perfect 100% each and everytime. Yeah! Yeah! I do that too but that is because of a genuine case of an idiot moment. I’m a total inept in multiplication and I have to multiply any series from the beginning each and everytime. But this bugger do all of these long mathematical formulas etc on his finger and voila! An Answer. And he can’t kick a ball even if his life depended on it. Ugh! *roll eyes upward

There’s another friend of a friend who is doing his doctorate in financial stuff, got a double degree and this guy if you left him alone for 3 days with packs of instant noodles and some cold food will most probably die of starvation. He is that inept in cooking! Yeap! Not even a Maggie mee and you wonder how low can you get eh?

So, the next time you see somebody who is too darn smart and they just can’t get the simplest thing right, don’t not be fooled. They’re faking it. It’s a way for them to make normal people like us feel not too much of a loser and them more human.

Now, if only I can catch them on camera to prove it. Oh shucks! They must have thought what I’m thinking right now haven’t they?…

Darn you geniuses! :P